a infertile shower.

so, last saturday, i was given a very sweet and thoughtful shower. it's so weird to be this pregnant and for someone to host for you an even that you long avoided like the plague.

before the shower, i had my hair cut and had them put it up so that i could feel something other than large. as fate would have it, an infertile, who recently endured a second unsuccessful IVF, ended up there too. i didn't want her to see me-because i am obvioulsy pregnant and preparing for some event which she would surely ask me about. and i don't care how nice and selfless an infertile who has just endured a second fruitless cycle-it would have bummed her out. this led to this text conversation with another, now pregnant infertile:

++

me: m is at hair place! across from me. she can't see me. i am in a tight stork shirt. and i am having my hair put up. fvck.fvck.fvck.

friend:oh yuck!

me:i know! help! she may see me-not saying hello is even worse.

me: wwjd. oh wait, you're a jew. : )

friend:you have to say hello if she sees you.

+++ 

i hope that doesn't seem mean. were her feelings not in question-i would have given her the biggest hug and would have loved to chat with her. but why add more sadness to her day? thank goodness-somehow she never ended up seeing me. PHEW!

anyway, the generosity of many people-most notably the hosts-reminded me of how lucky i really am. again, i am reminded of the video of the fireman who perished on 9/11 standing in his kitchen, with his family, saying, "man, how lucky am i, how.lucky.am.i" indeed.

my hosts were so sweet-lots of cupcakes because as you may know, i cooked cupcakes weekly and ate cupcakes three times a day the month i got pregnant. and they specially made me french fries which i have eaten nearly everyday of this pregnancy to starve off nauseousness. with a side of ranch, of course.

one of the hosts, is the nice internet woman that invited me out the night that i was so upset from IVF delay number 5. we've become fast friends. she 'gets it" as only a m/c'er and an IVF'er would.

as did the other infertiles. at first we were quiet and avoided "how do you all know each other" questions, but soon we were making everyone laugh with our tales of going to the RE and sperm talk at  public restaurants which once made our twenty something male waiter blush and swiftly walk away.

as it happens, all three of the infertiles were pregnant. i am due in september, one of the hosts in october and the other in november, as a message of hope--know that they all suffered and lost hope and, like you,  tried for years at much expense and m'/c'ed along the way.

here are some pics.more to come later.

me. but bigger.me with host. who is due in october. another IF surviver.

Comments

[niobe]

You really are glowing.

[Jen]

You look great! So happy that you had a great time!

[Ms. Planner]

I am sooo glad you had a terrific shower where you got to share and laugh about IF with others. It is not funny when you are in the throes of it but you have to let it go when you come out of it. Sooo happy for you.

AND, your baby u/sound pics are adorable. Really. Usually those things creep me out but your baby is lovely! And, I can tell you from experience, those pics are remarkably accurate. I compared Missy's out-of-utero pic with her u/sound 3D pics. Spooky!

[christina.apronstrings@gmail.com]

j-don't we? ; )

[Janimal]

Damn we look good in that picture! I am so glad you enjoyed your shower.

[catherine illian]

you look beautiful-- what a wonderful way too honor you and the baby

[Road Blocks and Roller Coasters]

You look beautiful!

[Emily]

You look so gorgeous and glowy and pregnant and happy - just like you should. What a wonderful thing to be there with such lovely ladies celebrating another beautiful woman to be. And if you did make the dress and I ever get pregnant I want you to make me one ;)

[Carrie]

I think you look beautiful, absolutely glowing.

I'm glad you had a shower and got to enjoy it.

[Cibele]

Your dress is adorable! and you look wonderful. I am glad taht you had your baby shower

[kate]

Ugh, I HATE YOU, you gorgeous thing! No fair that you get to look far and away SO MUCH COOLER than I do! Even through pregnancy, you are so incredibly stylish, and from what I hear, in the maternity-wear-world, that's hard to do.

The shower looks like it was a blast. Nothing better than having a shower with a bunch of people who know exactly how hard it has been to get where you are now.

And MMMM! CUPCAKES! and FRENCH FRIES! You have lovely friends.

[SCY]

More pics! You look amazing! The dress is awesome - did you make it???

[Elizabeth]

I'm so glad you got your baby shower!!!!

That's a super cool dress, by the way!!!! GREAT color. It really goes well with your eyes and complexion.

[Rebel]

You look awesome!!! Glad that you had a nice time...

Hugs,
Rebel

[Emily (Apron Strings)]

Aww ... you look so radiant and happy! You rightly deserve the baby shower!

[My Reality]

You look absolutely radiant. Did you make your dress?

[hilary (The Trying Game)]

I would give my right arm for some french fries with ranch dressing right now. DROOOOL.

I'm so happy to hear you had a lovely shower. You are absolutely glowing in those pictures. So happy for you hon.

xoxo

More pics please!!

[JessPond]

You are v v cute!! I like the dress, too....but your belly, that's the best of all!! :)

Glad you had such a wonderful shower!

[christina(apronstrings)]

julia-no i didn't make it. it is a skirt that i got for $15. at a consignment store. crazy, huh. i heart it.

[JuliaKB]

Sounds (and looks) like a fabulous party. And what a cute dress. Did you make it?

[Farah]

sounds like a wonderful time